


Enough for You

by JustAnotherUnderstudy



Series: This Should Totally Be A Thing [7]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: F/M, Not A Fix-It, Older Woman/Younger Man, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-09
Packaged: 2018-09-23 03:42:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9639311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAnotherUnderstudy/pseuds/JustAnotherUnderstudy
Summary: James will never have what he wants, and that might be OK.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick ficlet that came to mind as I watched Quantum of Solace the other night. 
> 
> All quotes from the films are done from memory so they might not be verbatim. 
> 
> Also, I wrote it pretty quickly so there are probably more errors than that.:)
> 
> Title from the song by Joshua Radin.

"Your mother?"

"She likes to think she is."

And wasn't that the rub? Wasn't that the very thing that bothered him? More than her job as head of MI6, more than the fact that she was his boss, it was this idea, that she viewed herself as a mother figure to him, that kept her from seeing what he wanted with her.

He tried not to think about it much. He tried to focus on the work. He tried to derive pleasure from women who were willing.

Above all, he kept up his inner monologue, the one that told him he could never have what he wanted. He'd wanted family as a boy, that was taken from him, twice if he counted the Oberhausers. He'd wanted love as a man, that had been taken from him more times than he wanted to acknowledge. The pain he felt from Vesper's betrayal and suicide were still raw.

"It'd be a cold bastard who didn't want revenge."

M was right, but now it was two-fold. It wasn't just Vesper, it was M herself. He was professional enough he could stop the abject terror he'd felt as he chased down Mitchell. The man had shot at M, but James had no idea if he'd been successful. Had she been hit? Was she lying on the floor bleeding out? Would Tanner be in time to get to her?

But he knew what she'd want of him. She'd have been angry if he saw to her instead of going after Mitchell. So he hadn't hesitated or thought twice.

He'd had no doubt during the frantic chase that he'd best Mitchell. To not do so was to fail her. That was not an option, not after the way she hadn't turned on him after Vesper.

\----

Russia

She was waiting for him, he was no longer surprised. He _was_ surprised by her words as he walked away.

"I need you back."

He paused only seconds as his heart skipped one beat.

"I never left."

It was all he could say in the face of her confession.

He dropped Vesper's necklace in the snow feeling that M was still watching, hoping that she understood what he was trying to say.

Hours later at the hotel he sat in darkness and stared out the window into the night.

He held a drink in his hand but he hadn't taken much of it. Getting drunk wouldn't help him. And he was flying back with M in the morning. Having a hangover would only prove to her that he wasn't over Vesper. And maybe he wasn't, but that wasn't where his thoughts were now.

His thoughts were with M. And how he'd thought before this mess that he knew her, that he understood what made her tick.

He'd thought to hear from her after his resignation, but there'd not even been a reply, only a notification from her server that she had received it and opened it. When he finally did hear from her, the calm voice as she'd explained that the money hadn't arrived was unexpected. At the time he hadn't a moment to consider what she'd done.

The finance minister was in the office with her and she was, in essence, defending him to the man. Betraying none of his shame.

He hadn't expected her to be so calm. He'd abandoned MI6 for a woman who turned out to be a traitor to himself and to the Crown.

And when he'd called after Vesper had died, he'd been sure there was compassion in her voice.

"She knew you'd be you."

James closed his eyes as he tried to place M's actions into categories and create a picture of her in his mind. But he couldn't. She never reacted the way he suspected, and she was always one step ahead of him.

"I knew you'd be you."

James opened his eyes as his mind finally had time to grasp the meaning of her words. She'd said the same of Vesper as she had of herself.

He set the glass down and stood. He took three steps toward the door and stopped.

No. It couldn't mean what he hoped. She was the head of MI6. A woman in a man's world. She'd clawed her way to the top. Even if her words held the meaning he hoped, she'd never act on them.

If it was reversed, if she was a man and James a woman, the system, and society as a whole, would turn a blind eye. But because of who she was...

No.

Dammit.

He walked over to the bed and fell on it dramatically, just to make himself feel more the fool.

He wanted her so badly he ached at times. Vesper had reminded him so much of her that he thought he could finally have that love he'd long wanted. But Vesper was nothing like M. M would never betray Queen and Country for any reason at all. Not even for him.

\----

"Good morning, 007."

M was already seated inside the jet when he boarded. He stowed his bag and sat across from her.

"Good morning, M."

She studied him and he held her gaze. He saw the moment when the unspoken passed between them. Just a slight surprise in her eyes, a little raise of the eyebrows, an inaudible catch of her breath.

Then it was gone.

Acknowledgement passed between them that they both knew but that they also both understood that what they did outweighed anything they might personally desire.

And James loved her all the more for it.

**Author's Note:**

> I really, really tried to work this into a romantic resolution, but neither M nor Bond were having it. :D

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Just Another Inspiration: The Moments In Between](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12848904) by [saye0036](https://archiveofourown.org/users/saye0036/pseuds/saye0036)




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